Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Freaking Out

Something's going on. My laptop started doing creepy stuff last night. I can't attribute this to its usual malevolence, since this is way beyond 'endearing quirks' like losing internet connection with two minutes left on the hour-long download, or pretending that it can't feel me using the touchpad. I was in the middle of typing a post when it LIT UP WITH GREEN FIRE. There was an unearthly crackling aura around the thing, and there was green light coming from the screen. With my usual flawless grace, I scrambled away from it, knocking over my chair, tripping on the ethernet cord, and nearly pulling the laptop off the desk because I was still wearing my headphones. I'm not sure if I was just imagining things because I was scared, but my fingertips tingled where I had been touching the keyboard.
It wasn't just the laptop, either. My window frame kind of shimmered with the stuff, and so did my charging phone. I stood with my back pressed to the wall until it went away on its own in a few minutes. Yeah, I know. Real heroic. Go me, fearless defender of the innocent. But what the hell was I supposed to do about it? Freeze the creepy green light with my wonderful electricity-conducting powers? I don't think so. I'm not even sure what it was. I don't think it was electricity, because my computer is fine and not melted at all. No scorchmarks on the desk, no smoke. The O key is sticking a little bit, but I'm not really sure what that means, or if it's even relevant. I stayed up an hour afterwards, but nothing more happened.
I have no idea what this means. If this was somebody's idea of a practical joke, then they have a great poker face, because I didn't catch anyone smirking today, and I didn't see anyone through the window. If someone just downloaded information off my computer and phone, I hope they enjoy their new music library (among other things...). I'm not too keen on putting my phone anywhere near my ear ever again, but it didn't shock me when I picked it up or try to whisper subliminal kill-everyone-and-eat-them messages in my ear (or if it did, it's not working). I spent a long time thinking before I turned on my computer. All my files are still there, my browsing history looks normal, and I have no idea how to tell if something else went wrong. The computer is still a malevolent piece of crap, but it has neither attained sentience nor melted down, so I think I'm safe. I sincerely hope this was just a weird atmospheric phenomenon or whatever, because I do not want to be spied on, and I do NOT want the tentacle monster apocalypse to start in my room.

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